Raindrop and sunbeams

Sometimes life is blurry and the rain clouds our view as it rolls relentlessly down the pane.

We all have days where we wake up and it's raining and as we pull back the curtains all we see first is the raindrops rolling down the window pane. The condensation has fogged on the inside and the rain outside is so heavy that nothing is that clear, in the foreground or the background. Life is like this too and metaphorically speaking we need these rain clouds to appreciate the sunbeams and good times. The sense that we are getting 'it all at once' or bucketed on, or an onslaught of bad stuff is our own personal low pressure passing through. And as the quote goes, 'every cloud has a silver lining' and every storm passes.

Life comes at us in weather systems. We have the long sunny spells. And then, in follows the low pressure behind it. Nature balances itself, nurturing and nourishing, scorching and hammering, but with every rainy day there are the sunbeams and blues skies, the light casting down through the autumn trees, making the shadows dance.

.....And we need the same to be able to move forward keep growing and expanding our horizons. Life needs to become blurry and fogged to allow us to step back and regroup. When the outlook is dim and out of focus it's forcing us to stop and look at things differently - to consider alternative options. It's when we do this that we can allow ourselves the space and time for contemplation. Yes, of course in some instances its better not to dwell or ponder too long or over evaluation and procrastinate - it makes sense to jump in on some things, when we have total certainty or clarity, and even sometimes when we don't, but we can't always do that. If we don't take the time to pulse check things against our standards and values then we risk making decisions that not only take us away from our goals but focus on the wrong things. We can end up expending energy on the wrong people, the wrong jobs, the wrong challenges. Some think this is fate, or unavoidable, but actually if you are very clear about your what your core needs and values are then its easy to refocus and test whether what is bothering you and casting the rain cloud, is leading you down a path that serves your values and keeps you going in the right direction, or whether its taking you off course.

Ive recently had a phase of stuff coming at me, some personal illness with my immune system thats taken a while to shrug off, and a family bereavement. Its been a tough time to say the least and a series of other incidents have pushed me at times to stress levels, intolerance, frustration and fear.

Seeing someone die is never an easy experience, especially as you see them fade away, stop communicating and leaving you bit by bit. Its a helpless, painful and sad experience. More often than not it can cause us inevitably to recap the past, the memories and experiences, missed opportunities, things said, and so forth. The very act of going back in to the past and remembering the good and less happy times is another prompt to grounding us and making us consider and reconsider what is important to us. Along with that witnessing the different responses and reactions to someone dying is also a grounding experience. As human beings we have often conditioned and specific responses and whether you celebrate a life lived or are lost in the grief of their passing, our way of dealing with death is a direct response to the impact a person has had on us, and among other things, it spurs us all to look at ourselves and how we might be remembered and how or if we will be leaving the legacy we wish!

All of the other incidents, when i looked at them standing back, proved to me my strength, my ability to accept, challenge, understand, or the need to question what and why. From this process you learn. You can move forward. When you aren't in a place of balance your thoughts are less rational and productive. I had to see and experience the rainy days to help me get perspective, slow down, reflect and take a pulse check on my own values. Often these things happen because we are out of balance, or we are avoiding something core, going against our gut feel or intuition or in danger of straying off course or being influenced in a way that might not serve us optimally.

There is always good going on when there seems only to be bad. Its a matter of seeing it there, acknowledging and being grateful for all the little things too. When I got ill, the team at work were supportive, when I had an attempted burglary whilst actually at home, people pulled in around me to send words of kindness and support. When my uncle died, I was able to share with my father and give him the support he needed and be a shoulder to others.

So the rainy days are there for good reason, and they do pass. The important thing is that we allow ourselves time to reflect, to take a step back. Not to ignore, or deny. By allowing ourselves to review our values and standards we can take action to move forward, always forward, with the best awareness of how it is serving us and our goals.